Someone said to me we shouldn’t take environmental advice from teenagers. I wondered, “Why not?” After all, given the environmental record of my generation so far, it makes more sense not to listen to 40- and 50-year-olds. Nor to 60-year-olds and older.
Documentally said he was working on a post for his newsletter. It contained five suggestions to help people cut back on single-use plastics. I replied that if he sent me the draft, I’d illustrate it. Instead of a simple list, he sent me complete cartoon ideas—all of which were better than I could have come up with.
Here are two of his tips. (The rest, along with the cartoons are at: A quiver of stories . (I think his newsletter is so good, I pay for the additional content.)
1. Use reusable shopping bags
5. Drink wine with a natural cork stopper
Plogging is a peculiar pastime. No argument from me there. But no more peculiar than, say, underwater hockey. (I must look into that again.) It would be great if plogging were made impossible. Not by a ban, but by a lack of litter. Maybe one day. In the meantime, plog on!
The first time I saw a plastic bag of dog poo growing on a tree, I had to have a closer look. How could such a miracle exist? A dog poo tree. It’s the kind of thing I expect to read about in the Book of Revelations. Maybe it’s in there? (I’ve never actually read the Book of Revelations because I’m anxious I won’t like what it says about me.)
I’m not saying dog poo on the pavement is attractive, but it is organic and nature knows what to do with it. Putting it in a plastic bag and tying it to the branch of a tree seems silly to me. It’s not like the environment isn’t choking on enough plastic as it is.
Of course, the bags could be compostable, which would downgrade the offence from pollution to littering.
It’s cruel to the dog as well. Imagine how ever so proud they must feel when master (or mistress) takes the effort to collect their business in a special bag. Perhaps, for a fleeting moment, they think it’s going into a special display cabinet at home? The kind of conversation piece you gather your dinner guests around? But no. Doggy’s pride is smashed when you abandon their poo on the branch of a tree. Out of reach even for other dogs to enjoy.
I bet the squirrels and the birds aren’t pleased either. Or the tree.
Of course, not all dog owners are morons. Some leave the poo right there on the pavement for you to step in.